While being kind and good to others is naturally a positive goal that we should all strive toward, there are situations where these sorts of behaviors can actually go too far – often referred to as people pleasing. People pleasing involves putting the needs of others before yourself, often to an unhealthy degree, and it can be an issue for some people who are taking part in addiction recovery.
At Moonlight Mountain Recovery, we’re proud to offer the very best options for treating addiction around Boise, Pocatello and nearby parts of Idaho, including drug rehab, alcohol rehab and various inpatient and outpatient options. Here are some common examples of behaviors that may qualify as people pleasing in nature, plus how these behaviors can impact your sense of self and even your overall addiction recovery – and some tips on how to avoid these issues.
Common Examples of People Pleasing Behaviors
There are several different kinds of people pleasing behaviors that may occur in everyday life, including:
- Saying yes to every request or favor asked of you, even if it’s inconvenient or causes problems for you
- Constantly apologizing and taking blame for things even when you’re not at fault
- Avoiding expressing your own opinions or needs in order to avoid conflict
- Going out of your way to do things for others, often at the expense of your own well-being
- Spending too much of your time and energy trying to make others happy or gain their approval
- Engaging in activities that others enjoy, but you do not enjoy
- Trying to always serve as peacekeeper or mediator in conflicts between others, even if it’s not your responsibility
While some of these behaviors may seem harmless, they can actually have negative consequences for both the person engaging in them and those around them. In addiction recovery specifically, these behaviors can be harmful because they can lead to a lack of self-care and boundaries – two things that are crucial for maintaining sobriety. It’s important to recognize and address any people pleasing tendencies as part of a comprehensive approach to recovery.
The Impact of People Pleasing on Self-Esteem
One major issue with people pleasing is how it affects self-esteem. By constantly prioritizing the needs and wants of others above our own, we send ourselves a message that our own needs and wants are not important. This can lead to a lack of self-worth and even feelings of guilt or shame for prioritizing ourselves. In addiction recovery, where building a strong sense of self is crucial, this can be detrimental.
How People Pleasing Can Hinder Recovery
People pleasing behaviors can also hinder recovery in several ways:
- It can make it difficult to set boundaries with others, which may lead to being taken advantage of or engaging in unhealthy relationships
- By constantly putting the needs of others before our own, we may neglect important aspects of our recovery such as therapy appointments or self-care practices
- People pleasing can cause us to avoid expressing emotions or addressing issues, which can hinder progress in therapy and the healing process
- It can also lead to feelings of resentment or overwhelm, which may increase the risk of relapse
Tips for Overcoming People Pleasing
If you recognize that you struggle with people pleasing behaviors, there are steps you can take to overcome it and maintain a healthy balance in your relationships and recovery journey. Some suggestions include:
- Practice setting boundaries and saying no when necessary
- Focus on your own needs and prioritize self-care
- Communicate openly and honestly with others about your thoughts, feelings, and needs
- Challenge negative thoughts or beliefs about yourself and your worth
- Seek support from a therapist or support group to work through underlying issues that may contribute to people pleasing
Ultimately, recovery is about taking care of yourself and building a strong sense of self. By addressing any tendencies toward people pleasing, you can set yourself up for success in your journey to lasting sobriety.
At Moonlight Mountain Recovery, we are committed to providing individualized treatment plans that address all aspects of addiction recovery – including any underlying issues that may be contributing to people pleasing behaviors. Contact us today to learn more about our programs and how we can support you on your path to healing and wellness, whether you’re in Boise, Pocatello or any nearby part of Idaho. We’re always here to help. Together, we can overcome people pleasing and create a healthier, happier life for ourselves.Â
